Jenna's House of Idiosyncrasies Version 10.0 [Focus.]

Original

Baby

Child

Teenager

Older Adult

Afro-Caribean

East Asian

West Asian

Masculinise

Modigliani

Botticelli

Mucha

Manga Cartoon

Apeman (50% Chimp)

Drunk

Make your own.

guests holed up with us during the ice “storm”, being told with alarming frequency that I look like I've lost weight, talking to Abie (because she makes me feel important), being able to drive again (got the busted window fixed finally), remembering once again what it's like to be broke and not minding as much as I should, finally any music I want to hear at any given time, all the time

I'm really frustrated with it going from t-shirt weather to freezing rain in less than a week.

There are eight people standing in my room right now, not including myself. It's like a sci-fi movie where it's the end of the world and we're the last people alive, and we have to stay together to live. Except, I'm fairly certain that none of us are secretly zombies and no one is going to have to eat anyone else to survive.

[I'm going to go out on a limb and assume this guy is taking Bowling as a P.E.]

“The only thing I've done outside of class this semester is I went bowling last night.

“She grades us on bowling etiquette. It's no good. I get really mad when I don't do well and stomp around and yell and everything.

“If she's grading us solely based on bowling etiquette I have a problem.

“The other day I took off my shoe and threw it at somebody.”

CB: “What do I do? I rock out.”

Jen: “Well, what do I do, Chris Brown?”

CB: “You rock out much harder than I do.”

Jen (laughing): “Is that a fact?”

CB (with certainty): “It's more than a fact. It's a universal truth of life.”

“What you need, Jenna, is someone who will give you pleasure.” Hollywood said this with a serious expression and looking right at me, but his girlfriend, Lindsey, was standing right there so I knew it was just a friendly sentiment of concern. “What ever happened to [the gentlemen]? I thought you had something going there.”

“He's too moral, he won't do anything. He has all these crazy ‘standards’ for his own behavior because he's Christian.”

“Yeah, you don't want to have to deal with that.” Lindsey allowed.

Backpedaling, I said, “But the thing is, he is so cute.”

Hollywood then demanded, “Corrupt him, Jenna! I know you can do it!”

drunk IMs in the middle of the night, cape cods, dumb webcam stills, cute Grill waiters, totally being the girl who shows up at the Grill 2 times in less than 6 hours, calls from the Indian, seeing old friends, Sugarland, good company

“Perhaps the most delightful friendships are those in which there is much agreement, much disputation, and yet more personal liking.”
- George Eliot

Scene: CB, Neil, and Jenna walking back to work.

CB: Neil, the girl in that car was checking you out.

Neil (huge grin): Really? Where?

Still moving, Neil cranes his neck around to try and spot the girl, and when he turns forward again he nearly smacks face first into a parking meter.

Jenna: Very suave.

CB: Actually, she could have been checking out Jenna.

Neil: Good point.

Jenna (concedingly): I am a sexy bitch.

CB: That's what I said. Don't you agree, Neil?

Neil: Yes, Jenna is a sexy bitch.

CB: Just can't be denied.

Neil: It can't.

Jenna: I can't deny it!

You know you are way too comfortable in your grown-upness when you proceed to get drunk with/in front of your father.

On Friday, the rock star played the big open mic finals at Washington Street Tavern, a place with cute bartenders and strong drinks.

You can see where this is leading.

My Dad was in attendance, and he had allowed a few other people to buy him drinks before I arrived at about 11:00. My favorite conversation of this evening? My Dad saw me pulling out my cash, counting and preparing to head to the bar. He looked at me like a six-year-old expectly naming off their birthday wishlist (let us not forget that my father doesn't drink often), a goofy, wide smile on his face.

“Jenna, I need another drink and I don't have any money.”

He shrugged innocently, the sappy grin still plastered to his face. I stared at him, dumbfounded. This was, in my tipsy father's eyes, a request to make the order more specific.

Giggling like a school girl, he offered, “I'd like a mixed drink, please.”

I relented. I do have some very favorable genetic material from this gentleman, afterall. “Long Island?”

“What's that?”

“It's what I'm getting, so it's what you're getting.”

“All right!” Dad laughed heartily.

I was on my second or third Long Island at that point. I had four or five before we left Washington Street. There are a few reasons for drinking that heavily, some of it needing to ignore things and people that are not going the way you want, some it it being a Friday following a long, exhausting week, but most of it being charming bartenders that wink at you coyly everytime you tip.

A couple other priceless father-daughter moments, both after all of my drinks had been consumed:

1. Dad, smiling uncomfortably: “Uh-oh, you just dropped the F-bomb in front of your father.”
   Me, too intoxicated to regulate: “Shit, I was hoping you'd be too drunk to notice!”
2. Dad, commenting on the 30 degree weather and the fact that I am only in a T-shirt: “Aren't you cold?”
   Me, smiling with delight: “I can't feel my fingers. I'm not worried about it.”

I know I went to the Grill with my father after that. I don't remember what we talked about.

I don't think I want to remember.

Copy the first sentence (or in certain cases, first paragraph) from your first entry of each month in 2004. Read More »

Jen (2:01:48 AM): hahaha you know what's funny?
Daddio (2:02:06 AM): what?
Jen (2:02:16 AM): you can see a generational difference in the way you approach IMing
Daddio (2:02:27 AM): how is that?
Jen (2:03:24 AM): you approach it as if someone were in the room talking to you and they have your full attention, there is a beginning and an end and you make sure to always say goodbye
Daddio (2:03:56 AM): oh... no, that's just you that has my full attention... I don't have a big buddy list yet
Jen (2:04:22 AM): people my age IM while they are doing all the other Internet stuff, they multitask, sometimes they talk to several people at once, and they don't say goodbye unless they are actually moving away from the computer
Jen (2:04:51 AM): even then it's acceptable if no one has said anything for about 5 minutes to not say anything when you leave
Jen (2:04:54 AM): it's just funny
Daddio (2:04:57 AM): ok I'll be lurking elsewhere... see you soon!
Jen (2:05:00 AM): later on lurker
Daddio (2:05:17 AM): hahaha

“Um, Jenna?”

(Not even half awake) “Yeeeah?”

“Phone for you... Someone broke into your car.”

(Suddenly completely alert) “My car? You're fucking kidding me.”

My parking service had called the police and had an officer waiting on the scene when I arrived with Abie.

I walk around to poor, wounded Russo. His driver's side window was busted in. Nothing was even taken. The CD changer was still in the trunk. My glove compartment had been rifled through, but all my paperwork was still there. My one comfort is that the interior lock on the driver's side doesn't work, so whoever was responsible had to lean through the window, all over the broken glass, and hopefully will be finding glass in their clothes for a few weeks.

My roommate Allison's car was also broken into overnight. She parks two lots down, a block away. The officer asked Abie and I if we have any enemies we could think of that would have targeted us.

No, I said. It's just an unhappy coincidence.

If nothing else, I now feel like I've gotten the full urban experience. Yey.

Jenna
     [11:05] to top it all off I now have a mondo headache
     [11:31] make my head stop pounding, won't you?

Neil
     [11:32] biggidy bam.
     [11:32] how is it now?

Jenna
     [16:51] "I trust you will use judgment to make it all aesthetically pleasing."
     [16:51] THANK YOU, finally!

C-Bro, Brown, CB, "That Brown Boy"
     [16:51] hahaha
     [16:51] nice
     [16:52] i am shocked, shocked, i say.

Jenna
     [16:52] 1) nice english
                  2) realizes we know how to do shit
     [16:52] points for [insert smart credit union here]!

C-Bro, Brown, CB, "That Brown Boy"
     [16:52] cheerlead!
     [16:52] hey [CU] you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind hey [CU]! *clapclap* hey [CU]!

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